M. Night Shyamalan Pranked His Mother-in-Law with the Fake Baby from Servant


-How are you?
-I’m good. I was backstage,
and Tiffany twerked for me. -Yeah.
-I mean, it’s good. -Well, wait. You were backstage
probably looking for Migos on your phone being like,
“I have to have this ready…” -No, she did it without music. -She’s a very kind person.
-Yes. -You’re obviously — You’re
known for being a film director. It’s very exciting to have you
producing a television series, directing some episodes. This is,
as one might expect from you, a fairly haunting idea
about a — [ Laughs ]
I don’t know why I’m laughing. It’s a couple
who’s suffered a tragic loss. -Yeah.
-There’s a nanny. Explain the concept real quick
and how it came about. -You know, I get offered certain
things to either, you know, write, rewrite.
or direct or produce. And this particular idea
came to me of a couple
that had lost a child, and they do this very fringe
therapy, this very rare therapy. It’s actually a real therapy,
where they take a doll and pretend that their child
is still alive and to help with
the emotions and all. And it’s such a tragic
kind of setup. And it’s very eerie
in and of itself. And this doll
that they’re using, the mom thinks
the child’s alive, and she believes it so much
that she hires a nanny. And then the nanny comes in,
and the nanny immediately starts treating the doll
like it’s alive. And so it’s a very eerie setup,
and so I was like, “I need to know
what happens to this couple.” -Yes.
-Yeah. -And that’s how you get into it.
-Yes. -I want to show a clip real
quick because this is sort of — Explain the clip
before we show it. Like — -Yeah, it’s — I can barely
show you guys anything about this show
without giving too much away, but this is in episode nine,
which I directed. And weird things are afoot. And strange things
are happening. And this is a moment, I believe, where she wakes up
in the middle of the day and the car alarm is going off
and it just won’t stop. And she’s trying
to find the key, and she finds the key,
and it just won’t stop. And there’s something
that’s going on that’s infecting their lives
in this house. -All right.
Let’s take a look real quick. [ Car alarm wailing,
horn blaring ] -[ Screaming ] [ Car alarm wailing,
horn blaring ] [ Alarm and horn stop ] ♪♪ -See, it’s very haunting.
You make very haunting films. It’s very distressing
to watch what you make. -Yeah. It’s a mystery,
and it’s been fun to do it in this long form like this
with Apple. It’s been — It’s been fun. -How do you —
Do you ever get scared when you’re watching something
that you have done? -I’m definitely — I’m — If you
watch a movie with me, if we were in a movie theater
together, I am the best audience member. I’m squirming, and I’m jumping,
and I’m like, “Oh, my gosh.
That happened to Kevin Hart? Oh, my gosh!” I’m definitely the guy that’s
totally reacting to everything. And even in my stuff,
when it’s working, I start to react like that,
as well. -And so — Obviously when you make a film
you do test screenings, you are watching
audience members. Are you looking for something
from an audience member when they’re watching
something you’ve made? -Well, it’s really interesting
’cause I make thrillers generally,
like, suspense thrillers. And what ends up happening — I
noticed this when I was younger, and I didn’t realize this was
actually a real thing. But as I’ve made more movies, it’s actually a science
what I’m telling you. So, you screen the first cut of
movie, and it’s really long. It has, like, everything in it.
It’s not paced correctly. And about 50 people
will go to the bathroom during the screening
of the movie. They’ll just get up and go
at some point in the movie. And as you make the movie
and you keep on doing it, then 30 people
go to the bathroom. And the time next,
there’s 20 people, and then 10 people,
then 4 people. And then the last cut of the
movie when it’s ready to go out, it’s two people,
and they’re running, and they’re backwards-watching
the screen as they go to the bathroom. And what’s really interesting
is that, like, you stop thinking about yourself when you’re
completely connected to the movie
and like 500 people forget they needed to go
to the bathroom. -Yeah, I mean, I guess the
perfect movie would just be everybody goes
in their pants, yeah. -Yeah, I’ve never —
never achieved that. -Never achieved that. Yeah. -I’ve never achieved that
Depends level of success. -I do, as would be expected,
like — You know, you mentioned
that it’s like a baby doll. The baby doll, though, is —
We have a photo of it. It is little bit,
I think, more lifelike than people may have expected. [ Audience awws ]
That’s a real — Yeah, exactly. And on set,
I would imagine it’s fairly — As far as props go,
it’s probably fairly creepy. -That is the doll
that they use in the therapy. We had one made for us,
and it’s — It literally moves, and it sits
with you like a real doll. My mother-in-law, who lives
in India, came to visit me, and I was showing her
my offices. And me being
a really bad son-in-law, I decided to trick her. And so we were walking through
the offices, and I went, “Oh, my — Oh, my God!
Someone left a baby!” -Oh, Jesus.
-“Oh, my God.” And she was like, you know —
She’s an older Indian woman. And I was like, “Oh, my God!” And she was, “Oh, no!
Oh, my God! Ohh!” And then I was like,
“Who would do this?! Who would do this?!” And she was like,
“What is this?!” And I handed it to her,
and she starts cradling it ’cause it weighs and it moves
just like a baby, and she starts tearing up,
and I’m like, “This has gone too far.”
-Yeah. -And I said, “I’m just kidding.” -Do you not get this enough
from your work? -“I’m just kidding.
It’s not real.” And she keeps on — she keeps on
doing this as she’s like — It’s a doll, and you can’t stop. Your body won’t stop because it feels and looks like
a real doll. I’m sorry I did that to her.
-Yes.

I recently ran in my local elections on a budget of 700 NZD. My amazing wife painted all 28 of my…


I recently ran in my local elections on a budget of 700 NZD. My amazing wife painted all 28 of my signs made from recycled pallets and an old fence. You can follow her on Instagram @artbyestherjt This kid is a better boxing coach than most adults Steam coming off a horse after a ride on a cool day Coast guard boat being put under a rollover test. Golden scarabs look absolutely mythical Triforce wood joint This Lighting In Norway Made The Earth Explode! Palm tree caught in a dust devil Painting by Pendulum Father & son project – Jawdropping Tesla Mini Cybertruck prototype! These glowing astro photos that my friend makes Inverted waterfall Black wolf Lake hole

Tiffany Haddish: Black Mitzvah | Official Trailer | Netflix


Tonight is a celebration! I have finally come into my
full-grown womanhood. It’s my mitzvah.
I’m here to teach. If ever you feel like
danger is around, bitch, start skipping. Ain’t nobody ’bout to
fuck with a bitch that skip. We all got parasites inside of us. “Tiffany, I know you on the
borderline of being an alcoholic.” I’m not no alcoholic. My parasites is the alcoholic. You ever have like
a really bad day at work? They go,
“Tiffany, you ready?” I’m like, “She ready.” So, what did we learn from this? Balls are always in motion. I don’t know if
y’all ever seen Drake’s dad? He look like
the black Inspector Gadget. The laziest strippers make the most fuckin’ money. Later on, y’all gon’
reflect back on that, like, “That was really good knowledge.” Welcome to my Black Mitzvah, baby! And yes, I’m drinking
out of a plastic straw ’cause I’m a motherfuckin’ rebel.

Do You Believe in God?


Good morning, John. Thank you so much for your video on Monday.
It felt like there was this hole, and Nerdfighteria had been asking us this question for so long,
and we had left it unanswered, and it felt very… it felt kinda wrong. It felt kinda
like a gap in our body of work. And it points out that often, asking questions
about the questions that we want to ask is far more useful than answering the questions
themselves. So for example, interesting question about the phrase “belief in God.” There are
more words that are hard to define in that sentence than words are easy to define. For example, “God”? Even people who go to
the same church, ostensibly believe in the same god, all have different visions of what
God is in their head. Everyone is always going to have a slightly different perception of
what that thing– he, she, it, is. But at the same time, it’s a very particular thing
to each particular person. And then you have the word “belief.” Interestingly,
uh, the question of what the difference between belief and knowledge is is not just a philosophical
question; it is an entire branch of philosophy called epistemology. So obviously, uh, not
something to cover in a video blog, but the longest-running definition is that knowledge
is belief that is true. Which is kinda strange to get your head around, which is why there
is an entire branch of philosophy, uh, concerning it. When we believe something, we accept that
there is a chance that it’s not true, but we have faith nonetheless that it is true.
Like it’s weird to talk about having faith in things that you know, like I know that
this water is not going to poison me if I drink it. Whereas, if I say that I have faith
that this water will not kill me if I drink it, now I’m not so sure I’m gonna drink it. But what really bugs me about the question
“do you believe in God?” is not that there are many more interesting questions surrounding
that question, like “why do we ask it?” and “what does ‘believe’ mean?” –is the motivation
behind asking that question. People who have asked that question to me, or to other people,
I’m just curious, why do you want to know? Because it seems like there’s really only
two reasons to want to know the answer to that question. One: Because you’re not sure yourself, and
you’re trying to inform your opinion, and you think that I’m some kind of authority.
To those people, I say: Thank you for thinking that I’m an authority on this. I am not, and
that’s going to have to be something that you figure out on your own. And if anybody’s
telling you different, uh, then they’re wrong. This is a question for you to answer for yourself. There’s kind of a 1.5 here, which is that
you want to reinforce your beliefs, and you wanna feel like, “Oh Hank, he believes the
same thing as me, so now I feel better about my beliefs.” Well that’s not actually going
to work, uh, for you; you have to feel good about your beliefs for your own sake. So basically 1 and 1.5, I’m not gonna help
you with that, uh, you gotta have to figure it out on your own. And the second reason to ask if someone is,
believes in God is kind of a shortcut to think that you know more about that person because
of a very simple answer, which is dangerous. This is the kind of pattern recognition that
we do constantly as people: we try to categorize things. And that’s usually really useful – until
you start dealing with people. Sometimes I feel like when someone asks me
if I believe in God, it’s like a blind person asking if I’m black so that they can put me
in the right category. People are constantly searching for little things that they can
use as markers to identify how and what people are. Like, “gay people are all like this,”
“Christians are all like this,” “atheists are all like this.” And that is – I mean,
duh – that’s really dangerous! So that’s my biggest fear, that people are
asking because they want to inform their opinions of me with this little one-word answer that
says so very little about who I actually am. After you’ve formed a strong opinion of who
I am and understand how I live my life, that’s when I’ll be comfortable telling you about
my beliefs and practices, which is that I am a Satan worshipper who feeds on the blood
of newborn unicorns. John, I will see you on Friday.

Death in a Can: Australia’s Euthanasia Loophole – VICE INTL (Australia)


Hi, I’m Ben Anderson from Vice-New York-office our friends are the vice Australia office And the company that sells products that help people end their own lives this is death, in a can. I can run you through how you actually use it if you like . the whole process [alright] the way the process works Connect the regulator and then with the plastic bag you put the hose that connects that to the bag? Inside the bag and stick it to the inside of the bag You put the bag on your head first of all and let it fill up By switching it on it’ll fill up. It’s full of nitrogen No, oxygen, then you breathe out totally get rid of every bit of gas in your lungs best you can Hold your breath a minute Pull this down and take the biggest breath you can and you’re swapping the gas in your lungs from air To nitrogen within fractions of a second you faint you faint straight away then you’re just in a fainted state , continue to breathe quite easily the bag just Expands and contracts and the gas is flowing into the bag, but you’re in a 0% Environment and you’ll die in about 3 or 4 minutes after that Max dog is a company we set up it really is a way to facilitate the distribution of these Nitrogen cylinders Which can be used for brewing which is why we call ourself max dog brewing but of course the main use for these cylinders is For people who want to have access to a peaceful and reliable death at the time of their choosing Hello I’m Betty from exit In my last piece of film I showed you how balloon helium gas could be used to provide a peaceful death This time I want to show you a new system. That’s now available One that has several advantages over the previous method The movement of Nitrogen as a gas to dispense beer with has become more and more of an issue over the last Few years I’ve been to a number of beer festivals around the world where they have nitrogen nights. We’ve got this idea that instead of using One of the traditional means for peaceful death was to use a gas, and I’ve traditionally people are using helium Why not use nitrogen and so that’s what we started to do so we set up a company to make [sure] that people have access to nitrogen. It’s very peaceful, and it’s totally legal and it has one other unique phenomena a unique characteristic and that is ,that it’s totally undetectable. I’ve seen several autopsy reports, and they’ve all come back cause undetermined Undetermined or inconclusive is how they describe it well? I’m going to ask yourself a question How does it do that if I’m in a room by [myself], and I’ve decided to use this [Mac’s] dog brewing I have to kill myself and I have a quick quick a glass of IPA And then I put the hood on and get on with it somebody’s going to find my body sooner or later with it with Paraphernalia on my head and it’s an empty cylinder next to me and it’s quite clear, then what happened So what we’re talking about really is where someone actually removes? The evidence the gas bottles and other stuff after the event for the sake of effecting this Undetectable death we’ve involved not one person But at least two and that’s in fact why I reported it to the medical board. I thought well You know it seems to me to be quite irresponsible to do that. Yes. I’m 63 years old. I’ve got a Chronic lymphocytic Leukemia, and I’m in the last stages of that disease and I’ve also got breast cancer. Well, I’m very sad but naturally, I’m very anxious about the end and Would like [to] have total control over The end of my life, I’d like to die at home. I’d like to die with my family Supporting me and I’d like to be able to say [goodbye] to them but unfortunately that’s not possible because of the way the law is they could be under suspicion [for] assisting me to suicide, so Unfortunately, I’m going to have to not include my family in my death [and] that’s very makes me very bitter suicide is not a crime But anyone who might attempt and might help you [end] your life That’s assist you advise or counsel you Can suffer serious criminal Sanction in fact two states of Australia still have a possible penalty of life imprisonment? For assisting someone to take that legal step of ending their life, and this is an anomaly. There’s no other example in law Where assisting someone to do something which is legal Attracts any penalty leave alone a penalty of such savagery if I came along and gave you the drugs and said here If you take these drugs you will die that [would] be assisting Giving people Mac’s dog nitrogen and saying you can use this and go and brew yourself some beer if you want to Or you can use it if you want to end your life Takes it right on the Edge because what we’re saying is that this can be used in that way But it can be used in other ways and because we’re not telling people to do this is effectively our defense] No one can tell you how long you’ve got but I know that I won’t live for much longer if I’m lucky enough to be home. I’ll have Probably a nice meal. I’ll probably have a drink of some Baileys Irish cream and I’ll settle myself into my [favourite] chair with my cats and I’ll peacefully go to sleep I I Think [sometimes] I do get painted as a bit of a ogre in the suggestion [that] I want people [to] live [on] indefinitely and you know at all costs and regardless of the pain that’s just not the case and Certainly that’s not the case in palliative services . palliative care is defined by two elements : that one is Reducing + relieving pain and one is to neither prolong nor shorten life So when we are talking about a natural situation, and we could care people get good advice as well So they get to weigh their choices maybe they do want to get another round of chemotherapy because of x y zed or maybe that’s enough so it’s not as if You know getting that kind of support is the end of choice. It’s not it’s actually an opening-up of choice Knowing you’ve got something in the cupboard That will give you a peaceful reliable death is immensely Sustaining in the context of serious illness people and we’ve know a number [of] them and to wake up every day with their serious cancer And say you know it’s dreadful But [if] it gets too bad, then I’ve [just] got to go to the cupboard get up my nitrogen cylinder And I can have a peaceful death and what that does having that knowledge having that ability is That it gives them the courage to keep on and I think it’s entirely consistent with harm minimization as a good medical principle Look, I’m not afraid of dying, but I am I am afraid of being forced to endure suffering and the indignity of being of being Totally dependent on other people while I’m dying and for that reason I [think] it’s my , should be my choice to actually Say enough s enough, and I want out Simple as that. It’s just a choice You can buy these cylinders we’ve been selling them all over Australia increasingly We’re selling them around the world once you’ve got them. You keep them forever infinite shelf life , it is not a prohibited substance Provided you’re comfortable of the process it will work well you

good side hustles that make money r/ Ask Reddit


how do you make money on the side I
write top-ten lists for a site called listvers.com they pay $100 a list and
haven’t rejected a single list I’ve sent so far I used to write for the comedy
site cracks combat list verse pays better and all the readers do on cracked
his hitch about every little thing in an article that’s awesome do you pick your
own topics and just google stuff or is there more to it than that
yep it can be about anything there’s a few rules like you have to provide at
least two links to a reputable website and backup all your facts and you can’t
list something that’s already being used in a different list
I usually randomly come across something interesting and build a list around it
after I have ten things I just google the subject name plus list verse and if
it’s already being used in a different list it’ll be one of the first results
if all ten are good I write my list its actually really easy and you don’t even
have to be a very strong writer they just want content they make minor
adjustments to it maybe change the title they pick out the pictures too
so no worries about copyrights or anything the day they publish it a
couple weeks after submitting you get $100 in PayPal it’s easy money if you
have the time I’m a stay-at-home mom so I have lots of that you know those Keep
Calm and posters that reddit hates yet I make design and sellers my last two
vacations were funded by these Etsy is fantastic my dad and I deliver hot tubs
for a small pool company we have a special trailer that makes it super easy
people buy these six thousand dollars plus hot tubs that weigh upwards of
1,000 pounds and then realize they can’t deliver it themselves
that’s when we come in and charge $200 for an easy one or $300 if it has to go
on its side we also remove people’s old hot tubs oftentimes they think it’s
beyond repair so they pay us to get rid of it we then fix it and resell it it’s
become quite the moneymaker sounds like an honest day’s work
I’m a party princess you dress up as Disney princesses with minor alterations
and such to avoid getting a cease-and-desist letter from Disney and
entertain kids at parties you kind of have to be at least a little good with
kids and have activities planned and know your character inside and out but
yet I’m basically a group of children’s new God for an hour or two and I make
$50 70 an hour it’s pretty cool I also go to yard sales buy stuff that will
sell shoes accessories antiques and sell it on eBay that brings in anywhere from
$100 600 a week you can probably be the genie from Aladdin or play mr. T or
something of the beast or any large male character ah mr. T my favorite Disney
Princess I had a friend who used to sell Alaskan land over the internet for 25
dollars an acre he made around $800 which is pretty
impressive I think the people would tell him what kind of area they wanted then
he would find a place and send them coordinates and a certificate of land
I’m also fairly positive this was a scam because I don’t know how it couldn’t be
certificate of land seems legit I sell plasma OLED is the future
instructions unclear donated TV at work I was telling my co-workers if I get
broke enough I would sell my plasma they all thought I was talking about my TV I
gave a dethroned Nigerian prince $25 0 0 0 last week so any day now the escrow
fees he promised me for my help are going to start rolling in after that I
won’t need to work odd jobs on the side anymore so glad I answered that email
I’m sorry but there was an error in the transaction we are gonna need $25 zero
zero zero more those damn banks they are always making
mistakes like that here let me just give you my account
number so that you can take what you need and just pay me back when you get
your Millions I buy cars that have repairable problems or at auction cause
at are dirt cheap basically I fix them up clean them up and get them purring
like they just drove off the lot then I sell them for much more than I paid and
invested in paths I flipped like two or three a month sometimes I’ve made over
$1 zero zero zero on more than one occasion one time I made like $3 0 0 0
but I got a ridiculous deal of the original purchase by my old wine barrels
and convert them into furniture and sell for cash doesn’t make huge amounts but
every bit helps and as my wife says at least it is a self-funding hobby ‘
plowing driveways I live in a town half full of rich trp is the other half scum
tree folk who wisely invested in some sort of plowing device whether it be a
four-wheeler or a tractor in the middle of nowhere basically they all have these
huge sass houses with long sass driveways but no means to plow them 10
bucks are Drive and I feel like I’m ripping them off since I also asked for
free reign to sled all over their property takes me maybe 10 minutes good
Lord Fergus I’m not a goddamn idiot I approached them with the price and the
promise I won’t get the cops called on me for trespassing so I can snowmobile
all over the place I also like helping my neighbors and community and they are
in turn helpful and appreciative of me I’m not being taken advantage of at RESP
satton finds like two hundred and fifty dollars and I negate that with ten
minutes of my time for which I get paid ten dollars I contract out to inspect
welds on construction sites make about as much in two days on the weekend as I
do during the week at my act should he find a way to do that full
time then I wouldn’t want to do it full time it’s a nice way to make extra cash
when I need it but I don’t like doing it I fix Vincent work with Kansas Nebraska
life fellow Nebraska near exactly what it’s like
I sell plants we’d like to know what kind of plants you sell buddy I buy rare
books and sell them online sometimes I just buy them on eBay and immediately
resell them on eBay for more money this used to be my money on the side but I
quit my job three months ago and it has paid enough to keep me not homeless how
did you get tint on face did you study something about rare books I’m confused
what makes you able to recognize them more what’s preventing the other buyers
from competing with you I’ve always been a huge fan of books so after college did
impact Lee finish my degree I started working at a local used bookstore and I
worked there I started to notice books I thought were worth more than our asking
price the first one I bought was a film that Bell Tolls first edition for five
bucks then I found the return not Sherlock Holmes first edition for $30
and put it on eBay it sold for one hundred and twenty five
dollars within a couple of weeks I did study English although with a creative
writing focus so I have a very good basic understanding of literature and
then I’m a huge CFE fantasy fan so I know a decent amount about these genres
honestly the key in a physical store isn’t to look for valuable books but
just to look for books that appear to be from the proper time period I don’t know
what a first edition of every book looks like but I know Edgar Rice Burroughs
published all of his books between 1917 and 1940 just this right here cuts 95%
of books out anything obviously published post 1940 and I check the last
5% to see of their first editions other buyers do compete with me but I still
find a nook at various flea markets used bookstores antique malls and online to
turn a profit and the more I shop online and look up
information about books the more I learn and the easier I find it to make money
on things since this will hopefully get burned
I write furry fiend smut on a site called ein debris
I charge $8 per 1000 words and for an example just received a commission for a
2-part 20000 word story I’ll let you do that math yourself so one hundred and
sixty dollars for 20000 words that’s $0 zero zero eight word aka not very good
for creative work be better off publishing for Kindle I do some stand-up
comedy wheel Tufton and money at it though I wouldn’t recommend it to anyone
really same here hardest thing in the world to do but
goddamn is it fun and the feeling of getting paid to tell jokes is just
blissful politicians must feel blissful I work as an audio to text transcriber
on the weekend it’s self-employed and I work from home I don’t earn huge amounts
and it’s pretty tedious not ever having a day off but it can add up to 80 pounds
a week or serve which really helps kids don’t run up those student overdrafts
how much time do you spend doing this usually somewhere between four and eight
hours on a Saturday and around six on a Sunday the pay you get depends on the
type of file number of speakers etc I have a rich 10 pounds hour on a Saturday
60 pounds for a 90 minutes file there was no work on Sunday but you see how it
can add up when it’s a busier time of year they’re very strict on formatting
spelling in deadlines oh I plant coins into rich volcanic soil so that they can
grow into big strong money Oaks this rarely needs to work I’m in the red
white of big rich volcanic soil is pricey so trees do grow on money I do a
bit of tutoring pays pretty well 30 pounds an hour sometimes did you work
more hours than you’re paid for prep travel and mostly the kids of Ts so it’s
pretty boring disheartening I also work a few hours a week at a food co-op they
pay terribly but it’s fun and a good course also do charity stuff and pay
gets topped up with funny looking or bruised bitch get some stock and some
beans you’ve got the Stute going i make
posters and album covers for local bands and small festivals it doesn’t pay much
in fact almost nothing but I love it it’s something I am good at in which I
enjoy and I work with awesome people from my local music scene there is
something really great about seeing your own work somewhere i porn my shitty and
severely regretted three months later I teach Gwen senator Wolfson surprise
dance routines basically I teach fifteen year olds how to dance for their Mexican
coming-of-age party get like 1k a month out of it there is a man that pays me a
few hundred Quinta spits in his dinner every few months in the months in
between he pays me a little bit too for me setting him tasks headed to Emmett
should have put this in past tense at the end of last year after a few years
though he realized that the same amount of money he was paying me to turn up
with a friend in tow and spit in his food then bid him adieu he could get a
proper Dom to peg him and ash in his mouth and put him on some kind of spinny
wheel no hard feeling sissy my wife is a soap maker I was skeptical
a homemade soap at first but after trying it I couldn’t go back I didn’t
even know my skin was dry until it wasn’t any more it also lasts forever
and smells pretty nice I use cash back sites and sites online that pay you to
do menial tasks it’s pretty poor money but every little helps quickly
I run a YouTube gaming channel took some time to get off the ground but now it
pays for itself as well as my gaming hobby the money is nice but getting to
entertain people and hear from them is much more rewarding for as acidic as the
YouTube community can be I managed to have some of the nicest subscribers I
own an online store I am currently losing $30 per month

President Trump: “I Like To Obey The Law”


>>WELCOME, ONE AND ALL, TO THE
LATE SHOW. I’M YOUR HOST, STEPHEN COLBERT. ( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
IT’S JUST OUR SECOND SHOW OF 2020. AND SO FAR, WE’RE NOT DOING TOO
WELL ON THE NEW YEAR’S RESOLUTION OF “DON’T GO TO WAR
WE’VE BEEN WAITING ON PINS AND NEEDLES TO SEE HOW IRAN WOULD
RESPOND. IT’S LIKE OUR COUNTRY HAS SENT
AN IMPULSIVE LATE-NIGHT TEXT, AND NOW WE’RE STARRING AT THOSE
THREE LITTLE DOTS. THIS MORNING, A TOP IRANIAN
SECURITY OFFICIAL REVEALED THE COUNTRIES THAT DRAWN UP 13
SCENARIOS TO RETALIATE– ALSO KNOWN AS AN AYATOLLAH’S DOZEN. U.S. OFFICIALS ARE REPORTEDLY
CONCERNED THAT IRAN COULD TRY TO STRIKE A HIGH-LEVEL AMERICAN
LEADER. WELL, I DON’T KNOW WHO THE
EQUIVALENT OF SOLEIMANI WOULD BE IN THE UNITED STATES. WHO WOULD IT HAVE TO BE? IT WOULD HAVE TO BE A WELL-KNOWN
MILITARY LEADER WHO IS A NATIONAL SYMBOL OF SECURITY AND
STABILITY. OH, MY GOD! IT’S THE GENERAL! GET OUT OF THERE, SIR! TRUMP ISN’T REAL HAPPY ABOUT
IRAN NOT BEING REAL HAPPY WITH HIM, AND HE SHOWED THAT TODAY
WHEN HE MET WITH THE PRIME MINISTER OF GREECE FOR A VERY
GRUMPY EPISODE OF: “CHAIR CHAT!>>Stephen: TRUMP WAS ASKED
ABOUT HIS DECISION TO TAKE OUT SOLEIMANI, AND HE HAD NO
REGRETS.>>HE WAS TRAVELING WITH THE
HEAD OF HEZBOLLAH. THEY WERE NOT THERE TO DISCUSS A
VACATION. THEY WERE NOT THERE TO GO TO A
NICE RESORT SOMEPLACE IN BAGHDAD.>>Stephen: (AS TRUMP)
“AND THAT’S WHY WE BLEW HIM UP, BECAUSE HE WASN’T STAYING AT ONE
OF MY HOTELS.”( LAUGHTER )
( APPLAUSE )
AFTER GETTING CRITICIZED FOR
THREATENING TO ATTACK IRAN’S CULTURAL SITES, TRUMP WALKED IT
BACK… KIND OF SORT OF.>>THEY ARE ALLOWED TO KILL OUR
PEOPLE. THEY ARE ALLOWED TO MAIM OUR
PEOPLE. THEY ARE ALLOWED TO BLOW UP
EVERYTHING THAT WE HAVE, AND THERE IS NOTHING THAT STOPS
THEM, AND WE ARE, ACCORDING TO VARIOUS LAWS, SUPPOSED TO BE
VERY CAREFUL WITH THEIR CULTURAL HERITAGE. AND YOU KNOW WHAT? IF THAT IS WHAT THE LAW IS, I
LIKE TO OBEY THE LAW.( AS TRUMP )
“I LIKE TO OBEY THE LAW, JUST ASK PAUL MANAFORT OR MICHAEL
COHEN. IF THEY EVER GET OUT OF FEDERAL
PRISON, THEY WILL VOUCH FOR ME. THOSE TWO GUYS– THEY’RE GONNA,
THEY’RE GONNA… WITH THE GREEK PRIME MINISTER
SITTING BESIDE HIM, TRUMP ALSO PRAISED AMERICANS OF GREEK
HERITAGE.>>WE HAVE A TREMENDOUS GREEK
POPULATION, OVER THREE MILLION PEOPLE, AS I UNDERSTAND IT. THAT’S FANTASTIC. I REALLY FEEL I KNOW MOST OF
THEM. I THINK I KNOW ALL OF THEM, COME
TO THINK OF IT.>>Stephen: (AS TRUMP)
“I KNOW EVERYONE FROM GREECE: RIZZO. FRENCHY. DANNY ZUKO. ♪ TELL ME MORE
TELL ME MORE ♪ DID YOU GET VERY FAR? TELL ME MORE
♪ TELL ME MORE LIKE, DOES HE HAVE A CAR? ♪ UH-HUH, UH-HUH
UH-HUH, UH-HUH ♪( LAUGHTER )
( CHEERS AND APPLAUSE )
>>COME ON, MAN. GET INTO IT!>>Stephen: SO THINGS ARE BAD
WITH IRAN, BUT DON’T WORRY, THINGS ARE ALSO BAD WITH IRAQ. ON SUNDAY, IRAQ’S PARLIAMENT
VOTED TO EXPEL AMERICAN TROOPS. SO IRAQ SAID, “GET OUT.” AND THE PENTAGON WAS LIKE… OKAY. EVIDENTLY, BECAUSE YESTERDAY WE
FOUND OUT THE DEFENSE DEPARTMENT SENT IRAQ A LETTER SAYING THEY
WERE REPOSITIONING OUR FORCES FOR MOVEMENT OUT OF IRAQ. BUT ALMOST IMMEDIATELY AFTER THE
RELEASE OF THAT LETTER, OUR TOP GENERAL SAID THE LETTER
SUGGESTING THE U.S. WOULD WITHDRAW FROM IRAQ WAS A
“MISTAKE.” OOPSA-TROOPSY! THE PAYING SAYS THE COPY OF THE
ENSIGNED LETTER LEAKED TO THE PRESS WAS A DRAFT. IT WAS NEVER SENT AS A FORMAL
MEMORANDUM. YOU CAN’T SEND SOMEONE A LETTER
OF THAT MAGNITUDE AND THEN SAY IT DOESN’T MEAN ANYTHING. IT’S LIKE SAYING, “HONEY, THAT
BREAKUP EMAIL WAS FROM MY DRAFTS FOLDER. NOW, AS I WAS SAYING, WITH THIS
RING, I THEE WED.”

The Science of Awkwardness


Hey, Vsauce. Michael here. Not knowing what to do with your hands or offering a handshake when the other person offers a fist bump. Forgetting someone’s name… Not having anything to say and
forgetting your phone at home so you can’t be distracted by it.
Getting caught staring at a stranger. Striking up a conversation with someone
you don’t know in a bathroom. Someone oversharing, telling a group too much information.
Overhearing a couple breaking up. Noticing food in someone’s teeth but not
telling them and, well, now it’s been too long and bringing up would be weird. Smelling a fart in an elevator that wasn’t yours but, well, now you can’t even react to it
or mention that you’ve noticed it or pretend to even know what a fart is.
All of those things are awkward. We don’t like awkwardness. It makes us uncomfortable, cringe. But what is awkwardness? Why is it good and who is the main character of the universe? To really understand awkwardness we need
to put it in context with the entire family of forces that guide social behaviour. Think of this sheet of cardboard as a
list all possible behaviours. It’s not infinite because of
the limits of science and biology. You can’t move faster than light
or be in two places at once. You can’t wear pants made out of molten lead. Next, there are legal limits – the laws of the state. They delineate what you agree
not to do, lest the authorities punish you – murder, stealing, speeding. What’s left is molded by the finder tool of social expectations. It’s not illegal to chew with your mouth open or not cover a sneeze on a crowded bus or act disrespectfully, but it is frowned upon. Punished not by the police, but by social ostracism, public opprobrium. Being called rude, gross, mean, annoying. Awkwardness is the finest tool. It sands social dynamics by smoothing out what
even etiquette doesn’t rule on. It’s not a violation of the laws of physics
to accidentally hug someone for longer than they expected.
It’s not against the law either. And the etiquette
for how long a hug should last isn’t black-and-white. But it is awkward. Like touching a hot stove or
getting a parking fine or losing friends, awkwardness nudges us to
avoid certain actions in the future and smooth things out when they happen.
People who demonstrate self-consciousness when needed are communicating cooperative intentions, which helps them get along well with
others. It’s no coincidence that brains, susceptible to feeling occasional
awkwardness, would become so common. They’re successful at cooperating, at social life. Feeling awkward shows
that you understand and are keen on smooth social exchanges. Now, too much or too little concern for social rules isn’t healthy, but researchers found that just the right amount is great. When a person shows remorse or embarrassment or awkward discomfort, when appropriate, others perceive them as being more
trustworthy, and their actions as more forgivable. And it’s not just perception. Such individuals also tend to be more
objectively prosocial when tested. Kinder, more generous. Even when a person
is completely oblivious to a faux pas they’ve committed, awkwardness still arises. People around them can feel uncomfortable. It’s called vicarious embarrassment and it’s a function of empathy – the ability to feel what others feel or will feel, when or if they realize what they’ve just done. The more ‘EEE’ someone is, that is easily sympathetically embarrassed,
the harder it is for them to sit through other people’s cringe-inducing moments, even fictional once like in cringe comedy. Researchers found that being more easily
and pathetically embarrassed does not correlate to be more easily
embarrassed yourself. Instead, it’s linked to being more empathetic, an important capacity for social creatures to have.
Our seemingly counter-intuitive attraction to viewing cringing moments like, say, bad American Idol auditions,
is perhaps then just a light form of morbid curiosity. You may think that awkwardness is totally different from physical pain or outright name-calling. But your brain would disagree. You see, researchers found that social missteps
activate, among other regions, the secondary somatosensory cortex and dorsal posterior insula – areas of the
brain that are also connected to the sensation of physical pain. Our brains process the breaking of social standards
and the breaking of bones through similar neural pathways. Likewise the same sympathetic nervous system that
mobilizes you to deal with physical threats, “fight or flight”, is activated by social challenges where awkwardness or embarrassment might be at stake.
Like events where you are very aware of being watched. Speaking in front of a group or embarrassing yourself in front of
onlookers or having nothing to say on a first date. Awkward silence… Your blood pressure increases, causing you to overheat and sweat. Oxygen is needed for fighting and running, so breathing
increases and digestion shuts down, causing nausea and butterflies in your stomach. Your body instinctively contracts into a
protective fetal position and fighting that reaction to act natural makes you shake. Blood vessels in your extremities
contract to prioritize major organs leaving you with cold fingers and toes and nose. These symptoms don’t alleviate awkwardness, they compound it. But that’s history’s fault. Long before human social dynamics
were complicated enough to involve “is it one kiss or two?” or politics at Thanksgiving dinner,
we developed primitive reactions to physical threats and haven’t had
enough time yet to evolve newer ones. Self-conscious anxiety can be tough to get out of our
minds after we’ve done something awkward. Fixating on social blunders is easy and hard to overcome. Why was I so unsure, so unconfident, so awkward? Well, some of the blame may lie with the neurotransmitter oxytocin. Oxytocin is sometimes called “the love hormone” because it modulates prosocial feelings, like trust and attachment, which it does. In fact, nasal sprays of oxytocin are being used to increase trust during couples therapy
and in the reduction of anxiety and depression. Though there are fears
that it could also be used to deviously increase trust and make a
person more susceptible to con artist schemes. But oxytocin also modulates negative social feelings like fear and anxiety. A dose of it makes people better at recognizing the
facial expressions for disgust and fright. It’s also involved in the
feelings that make us approach or avoid certain social stimuli. And it may play a role in making positive and negative social interactions more salient in our memories; that is, stand out more, command more of our attention after the fact, make us think about them more. Negative ones especially because of what psychologists call negativity bias. All things being equal, negative social interactions and negative emotions have a greater impact on our mental
states than positive ones. In fact, we have more words for negative emotions than positive ones and a richer vocabulary to describe them. Thus such memories and
thoughts can be tough to just get over. What does the other person think of me? I was so awkward. Are they telling other people?
We replace social encounters in our heads over and over again. Surely, the person we were awkward with
remembers us the same way we’re remembering ourselves
and is equally fixated on that awkward thing we did. Or are they? A great wet blanket for smothering the
fire of self-conscious anxieties is perspective.
Consider the famous advice of Eleanor Roosevelt: “You wouldn’t worry so much
about what others think of you if you realized how seldom they do.” As much as you obsess over yourself, you’re not the
first thing on everyone else’s minds. They’re worried about themselves, what you think about them.
And, more importantly, what they think about themselves. You’re not the centre of their world. Another famous old piece of advice tells
us that in your twenties and thirties you worry about what other people think
about you. In your forties and fifties you stop worrying what other people
think about you. And then finally in your sixties and seventies
you realize that they were never thinking about you in the first place. The tendency to act and think as though you are the
true main character of the universe has been called protagonist disease. It seeps into our behavior all the time. For instance, the fundamental attribution error. When evaluating actions you often view yourself as a complex
character, acted upon by various challenges and antagonist, whereas other people are seen as just
one-dimensional background characters with simple unchanging roles. The guy who took way too long
ordering in front of you this morning, well, he’s obviously just innately annoying person. That’s his entire purpose.
But when you take too long ordering, it’s because the staff was unhelpful
or you were flustered, preoccupied by an earlier conversation. You are the main character after all.
You know a lot more about what’s going on in your life. It’s easy to live like that. There isn’t time or mental space to
consider every other person as complicated and fully flushed out.
But they are. The realization of this has a name.
A name given to it by The Dictionary of Obscure Sorrows, one of my favorite resources and now, YouTube channels. They wrap
profound concepts up in tiny little word packages. To be sure, giving something a name
doesn’t show that you know it or how to feel about it but nonetheless
words put handles on things, so we can manipulate them,
hold them down, offer them to others, feel bigger than the concepts they label. Now, their word for acknowledging that you are just an extra in other people’s stories,
not even cast in most of them, is ‘sonder’. This is their definition of it. “Sonder – the realization that each random passerby is living a life as vivid and complex as your own—populated
with their own ambitions, friends, routines, worries and inherited craziness— an epic story that continues
invisibly around you like an anthill sprawling deep underground, with elaborate passageways to thousands of other lives that you’ll never know existed, in which you might only appear once,
as an extra sipping coffee in the background, as a blur of traffic passing on the highway, as a lighted window at dusk.” Acknowledging this makes your awkwardness looks small. But it also makes all of you look small. Tiny. A needle in a giant haystack, but nonetheless in possession of a big idea. Your blemishes are lost from far away, and so is your uniqueness, but the view from way up here… Well, it’s unbeatable. And as always, thanks for watching.